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They锟絩e not crazy enough to deal with humans, so they experiment on dead pigs or dead dogs.Their method: inject some Lazarus serum into the temporal lobe of the brain, which will pump up the hallucinatory effect of the body锟絪 natural supply of DMT, thereby reigniting the spark of life.I just re-read that last sentence, and it still sounds as silly as it did (with a bit more psycho-babble terminology thrown in) while I was watching the movie.This is a ridiculous science fiction-horror film that introduces people with good intentions who don锟絫 know what they锟絩e getting into, who then lose control of the situation, and don锟絫 know how to get out of what they got into.Frank and Zoe (Mark Duplass and Olivia Wilde) are the research couple who have put off their wedding in order to see this grant-funded project through. Clay (Evan Peters) is one of their young assistants, who is bright but probably smokes too much pot (can you really smoke pot in an e-cigarette?). Niko (Donald Glover) is the other assistant, also bright, who has a crush on Zoe. Eva (Sarah Bolger) is documenting the experiment on video. She has no aptitude for science.Rocky the dog has been put down by his owners because he has cataracts (could someone please get P.E.T.A. on the line?). He锟絪 injected, he comes to life, but he锟絪 kind of lethargic, not even interested in kibble. Wait! Check it out! His cataracts are gone. Wait! Look out! He锟絪 growling and snarling and ready to attack. He锟絪 gotten 锟?what锟絪 that word? 锟?aggressive!But let锟絪 just go with some of the actual script.Frank: 锟絎hat we锟絩e doing here could be considered questionable.锟紺lay: 锟絋here锟絪 something seriously wrong with that animal.锟紹ack to words about, not from, the movie. 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So Frank makes the obvious science fiction-horror film decision, and decides to inject her.Clay: 锟紹ut what if she comes back all messed up, like the dog?锟絅iko (after Zoe wakes up): 锟絋here锟絪 too much neural activity!锟絅ot only that, she now can also read minds and move objects, and her skin is turning black.Zoe: 锟絀 think something is wrong. I锟絤 changing.锟紽rank (at least I think it was Frank): 锟紿er brain is doing things the human brain was never designed to do.锟紽rank (definitely Frank): 锟絋his is all my fault. I锟絤 gonna make it better.锟絋hings go from bad to worse to much worse. The budget for the film is so low, everything bad happens when there are short circuits in the lab and the lights go out. Zoe becomes a monster. A solution is found and acted upon, but then the script writers change their minds and make it all go wrong again.There are some pretty good actors here, but they锟絩e dealing with shoddy directing and a dumb script, a script that has the gall to leave things in sequel mode. 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  • CTown Boy

    We neeeeeeeed you, man!


  • CTown Boy

    Stayyyyyyyyy


  • CTown Boy

    Don’t go. Just Don’t!


  • Everyman Cleveland

    Pleaaaaaaaase. Stay.


  • Adam Griffith

    Keep in mind that this is just a business and it will always be just a business. The sad truth of the matter is that Lebron is just like any other athlete in professional sports that is playing today. They are not playing to win championships for the fans, they are only interested in winning championships for themselves. The sad irony that lies within professional sports is that the fans are the ones that pay the players’ salaries, support the sale of the products they are pushing, and ultimately provide the fame and fortune that professional athletes yearn for. The fans’ reward for quenching these ego hungry divas (at least in Cleveland) is usually a feeling of heart break.


  • James

    Can we turn this into a hate site now? I seriously hate the guy and I’m not even a Cleveland fan, I’m from Pittsburgh. This article sums up my opinion pretty well even if he would have chose Cleveland:
    http://deadspin.com/5581889/lebron-james-is-a-cocksucker
    I was a casual fan of his and rooted for the Cavs a bit since Pittsburgh doesn’t have a team. But the truth is, after being a fan of his, I started hating the guy even before this stunt during the Boston series. Gilbert’s words were true, he quit in that series. He’s gutless and wilts anytime a series gets tough. He has been part of the team with the best regular season record 2 years and a row, and he couldn’t even get them to the finals. Why should I care which team he ends up on? Why should so many teams be sucking his balls to come play for them? These teams like New York that put together groups of celebrities to help woo Lebron should be embarrassed. Zero Championships, 1 Championship appearance (swept 4-0). Why should I have this story shoved down my throat like it has? Lebron doesn’t have the drive, the will to win of Kobe, Jordan, Magic, Bird and will never be in the conversation with those guys. It is clear he is more concerned with being a celebrity. He is going to get 1 or 2 championships in his career at some point I would think (I hope not though). He just has too much natural talent not to. But now he is on a team with Wade who already has a championship. Even if he does manage to get a couple, his legacy doesn’t hold up. Everyone will be wondering if he could have done it without another star like Wade who will have more rings than him. In conclusion, fuck you Lebron. Get off of my TV, get off of my radio, get out of my sports news until you do something worthy of being there.


  • To Realist: LeBron does not need a ring to prove that he is great. Greatness includes, Dedication, Loyalty and Commitment. Kobe was selected as the 13TH overall pick in the 1996 Draft by the CHARLOTTE HORNETS, then traded to the LAKERS. SHAQ did not go to LA BECAUSE Kobe was there. Kobe only started in SIX (6) games in 1996-1997 and only had 7.6 PPG. Kobe’s Legacy is insured BECAUSE he has STAYED with the Lakers and has led his team to championships with and without superstars. Go ahead. Yes, there are other Good players on the Lakers but no other Superstars. The Chicago Bulls selected Jordan as the THIRD overall pick at the OLD AGE of 22. Michael was 29 years old when he won his first Championship. MJ has insured his Legacy by STAYING with the BULLS and Leading them through the Championships. Everyone has seem to have forgotten that the 2009-2010 Cavaliers were touted the entire season as being the BEST TEAM in the League. They definitely could have won it all with the TEAM that LeBron won with all year long. At 25 years old, LeBron does not need to panic and leave a TEAM that is the best to compete in 2010 and well beyond. If “RINGS” are more important than “PERSONAL ACCOMPLISHMENTS”, the teams that were trying to recruit LeBron should have gone to any local pawn shop and bought seven or eight Championship Rings for a dime on a dollar to offer LeBron. There are 1000’s of Championship Rings that have been given to Third string players that have never set foot on the field or court of a Championship Game. You can find these rings at pawn shops, on EBay and Craig’s list. Let’s get over the “Ring Thing” and let’s try not to forget how great the 2009-2010 regular season was for the CAV’s. They still can “GO ALL THE WAY”!!! and win many Championships.


  • I agree Tom, LeBron has a chance to do something no one else has if he stays and ends the drought. I don’t know why he would want to go to Chicago, and play in the shadow of MJ’s legacy there. You don’t leave the team that has had the best record in the regular season for the last two years. He’s staying, I guarantee it.


  • Hot Rod Williams

    Let’s be real, Realist. No one talks about Kareem on the Lakers either. Throughout this free agency circus, I’ve listened to countless hours of radio and watched sports center religiously and haven’t heard a word. Wasn’t until the Lakers won and he walked onto the court that I was like… “Oh yeah. That guy.”

    And you can’t say with any knowledge that the world at large wouldn’t be impressed by a Cavaliers victory, because it’s unprecedented to see a kid play for the town he’s from and break a 46-year sports curse in the process (unlike Shaq’s situation wouldn’ve been in ORL, since he’s not from there and they were still a new expansion team.)

    And I say “kid” for good reason. At 25, LBJ’s still young and getting better every year. He has plenty of time. It took Jordan 7 years (at the age of 28). Who’s to say Cleveland can’t do it in 8? The coach and GM situation is not a negative. Mike Brown’s inept offensive playbook and inability to adjust during games has been the Cavs downfall. Not the roster.


  • Realist

    realistically, winning 1 ring in cleveland does not equal winning multiple anywhere else. shaq didn’t win until he got to LA and he is one of the top 5 centers of all time. kareem one one in Milwaukee and nobody even talks about that one, it’s all about the multiple rings he won in LA. If LBJ wins one ring (BIG IF) in Cleveland over the course of his career, nobody in the world outside of Ohio will see that as a crowning achievement. For his legacy to be established beyond dunks and individual accomplishments, he has to win multiple rings ANYWHERE, not just Cleveland. The Cavs have tried unsuccessfully for 7 years to build a team around him with ZERO success. The Cavs team even WITH LeBron in the foreseeable future consists of nobody but 34 year old Jamison, Williams who doesn’t show up in the playoffs, a bevy of hit or miss bench guys. LeBron would easily win 55+ games alone as he’s done the past two years, but he would undoubtedly fall short to the likes of the Magic and likely the Bulls who will land at LEAST one top 5 free agent. Long story short, if LBJ stays in Cleveland, he WILL NOT win a title anytime soon with the supporting cast the way it is and with not coach or GM to build. Talk about loyalty and “legacy” for winning a title in his home state, but the man wants to win rings and he’s given his all these past 7 years. He’s had some of his lowest lows the past two post-seasons and it’s obvious he would rather not have to face the media after another eliminating loss. I don’t think LBJ cares much for breaking the city of Cleveland’s history of NO titles because simply staying doesn’t insure he’ll EVER win. The team is just not set to win in the playoffs for years and that title drought will continue with LBJ feeling miserable every May, so Ohioans, keep praying that he’ll stay to appease every one of you rather than playing for his own desires and happiness.


  • LeBron Will Go Down in History as either being The Greatest (Winner) or Biggest (Loser). Being a LOSER is guaranteed by QUITTING Cleveland no matter how many rings he gets anywhere else. He will be a LOSER if he leaves Cleveland and goes anywhere (especially Chicago) and doesn’t acheive a “FOUR-PETE” or doesn’t win SEVEN NBA TITLES. He will defintely be at the TOP of the LIST of BIGGEST LOSERS if he goes to NEW YORK. The Media in New York and LA are ruthless. They Hound and Dig not to show that GREAT PERSONALITIES are GREATER. They Hound and Dig to find dirt and destroy even the most respectable of Celebrities. Not only will he probably have to carry a gun if he want’s to go to a Night Club, but he will also be putting all of his “Homies” in danger.
    He will ALWAYS be a WINNER if he stays in CLEVELAND. CLEVELAND is the ONLY place that he could also prove that he is The Greatest of All Times.
    If he chooses to leave the cities (Cleveland and Akron) that helped to make him what he is today, he will be jeered everywhere he goes in Northeast Ohio. EX-Fans will be absolutely ruthless at any game he plays in Cleveland. They will even travel to every game possible to boo him.
    No matter what his accomplishments are anywhere but Cleveland, he will be Guaranteed the Title of THE BIGGEST TRAITOR since Bendict Arnold.

    A smart and honorable man would not want his Legacy to carved into history along side of The Greatest Losers of all times.

    “My name shall be carved in stone alongside the great traitors: Lucifer, Judas, and Arnold.” -From the movie ‘A Question of Honor’


  • Angelo the Great

    CLEMIKE;…..WE CAN HAVE A CHAMPIONSHIP TEAM HERE AND IT STARTS WITH LEBRON AND THE CAVS AND THEN WHEN THE OTHER TEAMS REALISE WERE NOT CURSED, WE ARE NOT THE MISTAKE ON THE LAKE THEY TOO WILL STRIVE TO BE THE BEST THEY CAN BE AND WE WILL HAVE OTHER CHAMPIONSHIP TEAMS THE BROWNS AND INDIANS HAVE BOTH BEEN CLOSE IN THE NOT TOO DISTANT PAST!

    IT ALL STARTS WITH AND BY THE KING STAYING HERE AND WINNING A RING THEN IT WILL BE A SNOWBALL EFFECT AND CLEVELAND(AKRON)WILL BE RECOGNISED AS THE GREAT CITIES THAT THEY ARE!

    ANGELO


  • butcher23

    The way a team plays as a whole determines its success. You may have the greatest bunch of individual stars in the world, but if they don’t play together, the club wont be worth a dime.

    I will not ask you to stay in cleveland but i will say this just because you have better individual players around you does not mean you have better team.


  • Let’s do something GREAT before July 1st. How about a “rally” at the arena. I know that it’s not far away, but how about starting June 30th. Drew and Packy are you with me on this? Can we pull together possibly a benefit drive to Donate the proceeds to LeBron’s favorite Charity or cause? Maybe something to build a couple of new schools in Akron and Cleveland? Maybe name them after LeBron. If you are an event organizer, celebrity or anyone interested in making this happen, email me at my website by clicking on my name: Jace


  • I was at the 1964 Cleveland Browns Championship Game. Even though we didn’t have as much TV coverage, Even though we didn’t have instant replays, Even though we never won “The Super Bowl”, I remember clearly the fantastic plays that Jim Brown made at many, many games. Jim Brown is immortal. Not because he played in some big media mecca, but because he was true to the greatest fans in the country and ONE CITY. I hope that LeBron is remembered, loved and respected as much as Jim Brown. I hope that I can see at least one more Championship Team in Cleveland and I hope that my children, grand children and great grand children can travel the world as much as I have and still carry the pride of being associated with Cleveland, Ohio, Home of the Legacies of Jim Brown and King LeBron James.


  • Lebron, I love you man, I’m from Cleveland. I haven’t lived there in years, but Cleveland and never won &##$%$*, SO, stay in Cleveland man, and win the title. You’re so close too it, It’s not even funny. You just need a few more pieces — And then maybe one more great player. Lebron you could go down as one of the greatest players the that NBA has every seen. If you stay in Cleveland and win the title, you’ll looked be looked at as one of the greatest sport Icons, that world has every seen. (A Quote): (If any, and everything in life was easy, then everybody would be doing it). Wining an NBA championship, it not easy. Hang in there Bro, Antoine


  • 95% of all free agents go where they get the most money. Dan Gilbert said he will invoke the “home team rule”, so Lebron will get the biggest, longest contract here. It’s a slam dunk, folks. Just relax and enjoy the circus.


  • Rkline

    Lebron is a winner and wants to win. If he feels that he has failed in Cleveland maybe he will stay to finish what he started.

    It could go either way.

    I’m torn on how to vote at

    http://www.willLEBRONstay.com


  • JP

    Lebron means more to a specific city and state than any other pro athlete. With a better coach the last two years who knows what could have happened?


  • Mike

    Check out these Lebron please don’t leave t-shirts. Lets show Lebron that he doesn’t and shouldn’t leave Cleveland.

    http://www.zazzle.com/witnessprotection*


  • Connie Chung

    Who is LeBron James?


  • Lady Bridget Christine

    I think New York and Chicago are as cool as a nutsac after 18 holes of golf….”In other words they stink”. Go Cavs!!!


  • TT277

    Chicago is where the crown is at…come get it Bron.


  • TT277

    ChiTown has the pieces for Lebron to win for years. You want the throne LBJ? Go to the real kings empire and get it….you dont conquer Rome by invading its neighbor.


  • rjc

    Cleveland needs Lebron like the number ten needs a “1″… it’s nothing without the other!


  • Drew Carey

    Jay-Z… I heard the state income tax in NY is skyrocketing. You think LBJ is really gonna want to play in a city where he loses half his salary? Not like NYC is cheap to begin with.

    Guess you just went from 99 problems to 100, J. Ain’t that a bitch?


  • Jay-Z

    Yo, decent site but my boy is coming to the Empire State baby. ‘Bron and Bosh


  • Devin Lowe

    Lebron…you already hurt us enough when you gave up against the Celtics. You already have enough money to last the rest of your life times 10. Why not go down in history as the one who broke the curse? You win a title in Cleveland and the city can start to get over The Fumble, The Shot, Red Right 88, and The Drive. We don’t need The Contract added to the list. I have followed you since you beat Hillsdale in the Regional semi-finals during high school. So lets give it another go. Gilbert is willing to give an arm and a leg to give you the team to win a title. LETS GO CAVS!


  • Jeff

    Dude needs to stay, he put in way too much to turning us into an annual competitor in the NBA, how can you walk away from that? Let me break it down for you LBJ, why would you leave the free-spending culture of cleveland? Bring someone back to clevetown with you (wade, bosh, johnson, etc.) and watch you really establish a legacy in cleveland. Be the king of your home


  • Timmons

    Where are you from “Not 4rm Cleve”? Do you have wonderful bakeries in your city to be proud of? Perhaps the scenery is just stupendous? Well that’s nice but Cleveland happens to be a sports town.


  • Not 4rmCleve

    Yea, not that into people worship…”Our father who art in Cleveland” Whoa..If lebron is the BEST thing going for Cleveland, Then Cleveland has some major self-esteem issues


  • Hales

    Lebron will stay in Cleveland! No victory in another city will ever be as sweet if he does not win at least one here first! Lebron, we love you, you have brought life back to our city! Please stay!


  • LBJ will Stay!

    Great site! Lebron will stay, get the coach he wants, get the players he wants to play with, and get the extra 30 million that he deserves. Sign Lebron, sign and trade Shaq and one of the youngins for Yao and we will be back stronger than ever next year.


  • Paul Korel

    Bron Bron will stay in Cleveland. The firing of their coach is a sign of good things to come. The bigger question is who else is coming to Cleveland? Amare? Joe Johnson? Eddy Curry?


  • The Pope

    LEBRON I COMMAND YOU TO STAY IN CLEVELAND!!!!


  • Tim Timmons

    Our Father who art in Cleveland…King James be thy name!!!!


  • Lady Bridget Christine

    Lebron is to Cleveland like peanut butter is to jelly.


  • Wow. Your site is crazily fantastic! The video idea is especially rockin’. Just wait until hot girls start uploading their vlogs, too. That will be fun for everyone!

    You better believe I’ll be blogging about your site, soon, too. Keep watch: http://lebromageddon.com

    Oh, and Scott Bassano: I know a girl who started crying when she on the news that LBJ died; she had NO CLUE who “Lady Bird Johnson” was. So the fact that LeBron eclipses all other historical figures here in Cleveland should be testament alone to his hometown significance.


  • Scott Bassano

    Great Website!!! We need LBJ to stay here in the Cleve!!! (LeBron James, not Lyndon B. Johnson, just FYI…)


  • The Truth

    If James wants a ring, he needs to get out of Cleveland.


  • LeBron's lost twin

    King James Is Cleveland!!


  • Valerie Pervo

    Do you believe everything you read Bobby? It’s all just the media circus trying to make stories out of nothing. LeBron in C-town forever!!!!


  • Bobby Harkless

    Doesn’t matter cuz of Delonte. You can’t hook up with a dude’s mom. Not cool. LBJ is gone


  • Tim Skok

    Amen, Ricky.


  • Rick Felts

    He travels constantly. He doesn’t have to live there to have a friend there. What about his hometown roots?!


  • Sarah Spahr

    Yeah, but LeBron’s like best friends with Jay-Z. Why wouldn’t he go to New York.


  • Eric Lawlor

    Same goes for playing in New York or Chicago. They ain’t short on titles…


  • Tom McDonough

    Think about it. Given Cleveland’s abysmal sports past over the last 46 years, no town gives LeBron a better opportunity to go down as the best ever. Did Jordan break a 46 year sports curse? No. Did Kobe? No. What do you say, LBJ? Up for the challenge?


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